Greetings sports fans and welcome to yet another unbelievable episode of Vegas Valley Sports Beat. That spicy little meatball of a sports column that, stands for truth, justice, and the American way. American ideals that may never be affordable without a struggle again, but a top of the line college education still is. Just show the right people this coupon and tell them your movie star mommy sent you.

Monsters University Personal Checks

That kind of puts the term, artificial intelligence, in a whole new perspective doesn’t it? Especially when you consider the added dynamic that comes from knowing that these very same people who have effectively eliminated any semblance of respectability and integrity associated with an American college entrance examination are still running around loose. That is really and truly scary in so many ways.

Let’s not forget that the credibility of the degrees awarded by those and really any school, now amount to Jack because of the other benefit of the doubt. The one that smears tar on everyone with the same wide brush. Guilt by association. Not to mention the skyrocketing cost of a 4-year degree program that is far more likely to inspire graduates to speak in public, if only to ask about one’s desire for having fries or not.

Not even to mention the unimaginable depths one has to plumb to sink that low on the ladder of human evolution. If your kid is stupid and just breezing through college on the Visa Card study plan anyway, what then is the point of spending all that money in the first place? Why not just operate the whole thing openly as a kind of McDiploma degree mill? You’d remove unfair competition amongst actual undergraduate candidates? Why hide it? I mean, if you are not too ashamed to trot out to the West Coast for that fake Senior prom and graduation photo op what is the point in hiding the fact too? Because that would not seem real?

Just think about it. Colleges who encourage such behavior can open a McDiploma outlet in the student exchange or wherever. For the price of admission, the lucky graduating student receives a snappy one size fits all cap and gown and a special VR graduation ceremony. Then, when it comes t time for them to receive their diploma, if they can hold out their actual hand as instructed, they get 1 rubber stamped sheepskin, a lovely commemorative photograph, and parking validation.

Confetti balloons and honors cost extra.

I can only speak for myself of course, but I can’t help thinking about, David Hogg, who was denied by some of those same institutions of higher learning. Even though he has a 4.2 GPA!

He is probably peddling fast and furiously for Southern California on his bicycle even as we go to press. No doubt to interview student victims with his cell phone. And who is to say not rightfully so?

This does raise a whole new set of interesting questions, however; such as how David Hogg ever got a 4.2 GPA when I have never seen him anywhere near a classroom that wasn’t full of reporters. Opps my bad. I should say, a classroom full of journalists, and CNN. Lest the two should somehow be confused. That’s my question anyway, even if it is no one else’s. Curious.

According to UC’s website, a 3.4 GPA is required for non-California residents. Hogg has a 4.2 GPA and an SAT score of 1270. Hmm. Curiouser and curiouser.

UCLA processed 102,232 student applications in 2017, admitting 16.1 percent of those, with an average GPA of 4.2, SAT reading scores of 640-730 and SAT math scores in the 640-770 range.

By those statistics, Hogg is barely an average student and has a slightly lower SAT score than most. Plus he is an out-of-state student and would be required to pay higher tuition rates than California residents do.

What I find truly interesting is that Hogg managed to get admitted to Harvard but not UCLA. First of all 1270 isn’t going to get you into anywhere if your competition is getting 1420. You get what you pay for, or so I’ve heard anyway.

If one were to take the low road they live on, one could easily infer any number of interesting scenarios from this information. Like perhaps suggesting that 1270 was all Hogg’s family could afford so when he went to UCLA to apply he might not have had enough money left over to cover the price of admission. But that calls for speculation so I’ll leave that to CNN.

People are beginning to realize now, just how deep the college entrance sale scandal actually goes. Outrage has been growing exponentially as it dawns on many degree holders that all of their genuine hard work and dedication to studying for the past 16 years or more has just turned to ashes in their mouths. As one might expect they do not savor the flavor.

I have a Bachelor’s degree in civil engineering but mine is an equivalency degree which means I worked my butt off for 30 years in the field of structural steel erection and demonstrated that I was worthy of the awarded degree when I passed the ICC Special Inspector exams. I was there alone just me, myself and my code books so I know I earned mine.

I know how I would feel if I found out that the ICC was selling Special Inspector certifications to the highest bidder. Those students are absolutely right to feel betrayed by colleges who have undoubtedly expelled students for ethics violations while at the same time they were selling admission to their exclusive colleges to privileged kids. Some of whom didn’t even want to go to college in some cases.

Pearson-Vue would not allow anything but code books a pen and a calculator, which they provided, to be taken into the exam room so hiring Felicity Huffman & friends to take them for me would have been a huge waste of time and money. Thank God I dodged that bullet.

I do however have a bone to pick with California because I applied to all four military Academies in 1979 and was not accepted to any of them because I had to be nominated by my state Senator or Congressman. Not to imply they were in cahoots with any of this mess only that, who can say anymore? As difficult as it might be to imagine anyone in the past being corrupt, or willing to bribe a Legislator from California to secure a place for Junior in a top college. I would have given my life to attend West Point or UCLA Medical School, but never my honor. Never that.

For most of my 30-year career as a structural Ironworker, I was a teacher in the field. I taught inexperienced people to become Journeymen Ironworkers so they could earn more money and teach others in turn. Now I’m a structural steel Inspector. I had to travel out of state and go back to school for 10 days of intensive study to get it too. I have even been a teacher’s aide assisting in grade school classes when I was in Junior High school.

For whatever it’s worth to anyone but me I am a full Professor of Hogwarts the actual school and a member of the board of education. For even longer than anything else I’ve been a student of many disciplines and of learning. I have an insatiable curiosity and I love to indulge it. I love to hear new theories and ideas in any field. Because they are all connected in some way so there is no denying that the more you know the further you will go.

To say that I love to teach a willing student and that I believe with every fiber of my being in the value of higher education to the extent that one should never stop learning to whatever capacity as they are able is an understatement. The level of revulsion this scandal evokes is unspeakable to me and I feel it personally for everyone who is affected negatively by it through no fault of their own. The real tragedy is that it is so petty on the part of those who perpetrated it and was so unnecessary.

From now on any college SAT exams not given in a secure and supervised environment should by rights be suspect unless proven otherwise by the candidate tested. I contend that the services of Pearson-Vue is the proper and immediate venue to remedy that situation and lay the question to rest permanently.

Certified school transcripts speak for themselves and from now on that might be a wise course for any train or school of thought when it comes to hiring or possibly even firing personnel based on collegiate performance or ethical conflicts. This certainly does tend to show the character and work ethic of the individual student.

This would not only be fair to the students as a whole, it would level the playing field once more and allow those who worked hard to obtain their degrees to show their work and prove their merit. But no student should ever have that work questioned unjustly, or be denied a well-earned chance at an education due to another person’s lack of honor or discretion.

I can’t help but wonder, given all the long late-night hours I spent filling out paperwork, studying, and writing letters to my elected representatives; if my time might have been better spent had I skipped over all of that and filled out this form correctly instead. I’m glad I never had to find out.

My own special thank you to Disney Pixar for the MU check and for whom all rights are reserved. In no way shall this article be implied to include Monsters University or West Point. I love you and we all know that monsters don’t cheat because even monsters honor their own dignity.